My darling Moira, what I'd really like for you to know is...

Image: Kelly Sikkema @ inkypixelsdesign.com

[Note: Links below may be affiliate links. As an amazon associate, this blog earns coffee money from qualifying purchases.]

I can’t remember where I got the idea to use this prompt (and if you know, will you contact me? I’d really love to credit this woman and her blog), but it has completely changed the way I journal in the mornings. Inspired by Julia Cameron’s The Artist Way and Tara Mohr’s Playing Big, I have been using this prompt to begin my morning pages and it has completely transformed the way I use my journal and the impact it has on my day.

A real classic!

First, Morning Pages.

Discussed in The Artist’s Way, the author Julia Cameron proposes that you write by hand on paper every morning in a free flowing, no editing, no stopping way in order to really get your creative juices flowing, as a way to prime the pump as it were. The idea is that you let things flow, you get into a positive routine. I know that for some people this has been a powerful practice, just in allowing them to get crap off their chests and really let it go there, and for others it has been a way to get the crappy writing over with so that they can connect to the “good stuff” they are working on. For me, it was often a practice in merely being consistent.

Sometimes, I felt connected with my muse, inspired and the writing would flow. Occasionally in a way that I would then transcribe or type up a version of what I had just written in my notebook. Other days, I wrote stream of consciousness crap; spending the hour writing “I really don’t know what to write” or “I have to keep writing for another page and I have no idea when this is going to end and I’m ready for this to be over so I can start my day or get another cup of coffee.” You have no idea the number of ugly run-on sentences that were in there.

And…

I kept writing. 3 pages, using up my pens, day after day, mostly in the morning but sometimes later in the day. I wrote. And it felt good. I don’t know what was happening exactly, but I did feel like I had the opportunity to process emotions that needed to come out and I was proud of myself for being so consistent and keeping this commitment to myself. I felt more inspired and connected to that creative side to myself. And I actually finished journals!

This last point seriously deserves the exclamation point. Up to this point, in all the many years I had been writing, I had never finished a journal. This maybe was the biggest motivator back then, and well, if I am to be honest, that joy of completion is still one of the reasons I am still able to write.

My darling Moira, what I'd really like for you to know is...

One day, lurking on Pinterest or the interwebs, I came across this lovely prompt. “My darling Moira, what I’d really like for you to know is…” Now, the post did not say Moira, as that is my name not the author’s. But using this prompt I somehow began to access that part of my brain that had maybe been nonverbal or just not able to show up and really communicate. My unconscious, or possibly the collective unconscious if you enjoy Jung, and when I began my journal with these words, it began to speak. The information that came out, and yes, it was informative, was sweeter, more positive, more powerful. The act of speaking to my darling Moira allowed a kindness and grace that might not have been there before. And sometimes what I wrote was just what I needed to hear to take that next step or do the thing that I had been wanting to do, but had put off.

I really enjoyed the audiobook, but I am considering buying this to gift to that friend who really needs to hear what she has to say.

Time for you to Play Bigger!

And then, with my lovely book group hosted by Digital Nomad Girls, I read Tara Mohr’s Book Playing Big. I enjoyed this (audio)book for so many reasons: a powerful message intended to empower women, deep thinking on subjects that matter to me, enjoyable storytelling, and the idea that each of us can access our own inner mentor who can guide us to the life we want.

In her book, she introduced the idea of your “inner mentor” with an exercise meant to help you drop into a space where you can visualize yourself in the future. Not the near future, but a future where you are living the life you may only be dreaming about at the moment. There she is, your future self, that more realized version of you in an environment that is closer to your ideal. She takes you through a guided visualization that lets you meet this mentor and speak with her.

So, I have to be honest with you. I had done a similar visualization process before. I attended the same co-active coaching training at the Coaches Training Institute (now called Co-Active Training Institute) and there we were guided through this visualization and I had difficulty connecting with it and did not get much the first time I tried it. And the author herself shared that the first time she did this visualization, she didn’t see anything like a positive version of her future self, more like the cautionary tale of who she would be if she continued to live her life like she was doing. In some ways, I wonder if this might not be more powerful.

I had a coach who once asked me, I know that you are “maintaining” right now and holding on through this difficult situation so how will you feel if this continues next month, next year, for the next five years? At that moment I had a huge visceral “NO!” I didn’t even have to think about it. This changed the way I saw my situation from the moment that I was enduring, sucking it up, just getting through to the place where I was going to draw the line and make a change.

In any case, the author of Playing Big, realized that through this visualization she could connect with her future self. And, unlike the accepted wisdom that tells us that in order to learn something as an adult, we need to seek teachers and mentors outside of us, that she could connect with this future self/inner mentor and get the guidance she really needs. Honestly, who knows you better? Who wants more for you? Who else can tell you how to get where you really want to go and what tools you need to get there?

And so, I began imagining that by using this journal prompt every morning, I was giving my inner mentor the opportunity to speak with me. Honestly, some days she has nothing to say. Some entries just say, “you are on the right path so just keep going.” And then there are the days where I get this whole download of encouragement, truth, specific steps, admonishment to do the difficult thing that I’ve been avoiding or resisting, acceptance, celebration, and reminders of the vision of the life I would like to be living and the human I’d like to be in the world. Having this connection is so powerful for me and so very necessary.

Combining The Artist’s Way Morning Pages free-writing with this journal prompt and the suggestion that this is my mentor speaking to me and telling me exactly what I need to hear in this very moment has been the transformative practice I’d been seeking.

And that has made all the difference.

You need a new motto

Feeling tired, bored, cranky? 

You need a motto.

Mottos help us actively re-write the negative scripts in our heads and change our futures. Saying something repeatedly re-wires our brains and pushes us out of our ruts.

Mottos are magic. 

Mottos are especially amazing if you make your own. Really. Check it out when you hear yourself repeating something you’ve said before or when you are challenged and responding in the same way you’ve always done. Then choose a motto that will help set you on your new, better path. Say it like a mantra. Write it on your mirror. Put it on your phone. Make it your password for your computer that you have to enter every 15 minutes.

My mother used to say “(I’m) moving on!” Instead of getting stuck, dwelling over what she couldn’t change, she’d say this and consciously choose to let things go.

If you aren’t sure about making your own motto, you can experiment with the ones below. Try them out; say them out loud and see how it feels in your gut. Consider a place where you may be stuck and try out the opposite. 

Anything positive can work, and the shorter the better.

You may be familiar with:

“Faster, higher, stronger” - Olympics

“Just do it” - Nike

“Don't be evil” - Google 

Or

“Do the right thing” - Google’s new parent company Alphabet

“Do... or do not. There is no try.” - Yoda

But some others you may know (and some of my favorites):

YOLO - you only live once

Family first

Carpe diem - Seize the Day

Close the loop [why I use this motto]

Maximum effort

Don’t worry, be happy

Get shit done

No surrender

Rome wasn’t built in a day

Light the fire. Be the spark.

Vision without action is a daydream - Japanese proverb

It’s better to light a candle than curse the darkness

Act or accept

Progress, not perfection

Do no harm

Simplify

Pain today is strength tomorrow

Begun is only half done - Restatement of Horace quote

Life is short, buy the shoes

I’m moving on 

Life is what you make it

No excuses

You don’t ask, you don’t get

Don’t live your fears, live your dreams

Start with what you know

Failure teaches

My work matters

Come too far to quit

Never say die

Everyday I grind

In it to win it

Teamwork makes the dream work

No obstacles, only challenges 

And finally, my mom’s favorite:

“Life is uncertain. Eat dessert first.”

Words have power. When you use words in a powerful way, you can alter the way you see the world. And you can change everything. 

So what’s your motto? Email me and let me know your mottos so I can add it to the list!

The App That Saved My Business

[Note: Anything like this means that if you click through and buy something I may get a little money and it doesn’t cost you anything extra. I’m not all about the money, but I’m happy to share stuff I like.]

When I was first starting out, I wanted to do everything myself. And I did it all on paper. And it was hard.

Then I discovered Acuity Scheduling. I looked at several different programs and tested a few out. I had used a larger more well-know program as a yoga and Pilates mat teacher and found it challenging to learn and clunky to use. I especially was challenged by the fact that when I finally was able to speak with their Help Desk rep asking about a way to substitute a name for a sick teacher, I was told simply, no, you can’t do that.

Acuity Scheduling

Completely changed the way I do business…

My first week using Acuity under the Free Forever plan, I contacted them with a question and a possible feature request. They responded in 24-hours, actually understood what I was asking about, gave me a clear answer with a link to further information and asked some relevant questions about what features I really wanted and why. They cared about my experience and what I had to say, taking my feedback seriously. Amazing!

After using the scheduler for about 2 weeks, I realized that I loved it. Simple, easy to use and set up. Links directly to my Google Calendar. So, I purchased the 1 calendar plan (mostly for the automatic email reminders to clients) and got started. I linked it to my paid Zoom account so it would automatically schedule video conferences for my coaching calls and client work. I linked it to my credit card payment processor so my clients could pay for my sessions in advance and neither of us would have to worry about it. I put the app on my phone so I could see my day’s schedule at a glance and used it to process “on the spot” appointments so when I met with someone I could pull it out and they could schedule a time right there in the moment.

Acuity made everything so easy. Plus, I loved the founder’s story. He created this system for his mother, a massage therapist, and you can really tell in the care and thoughtfulness about what a solopreneur might need.

PROs - great real human customer service, lots of integration, well thought out interface, super easy to add link to your website or share in an email

CONs - [super technical gripe] when copying a link from the app to share - the system automatically copies the title of the link plus the link itself, so that if you go to add this directly to a third-party program such as What’s App, which I use for many of my clients to text internationally, you get an unusable link. I’ve had to create a workaround that involves copying the link, pasting it into a text message, re-copying only the portion of the link that is the link itself, and then pasting it in the What’s App chat. Seriously, this is my biggest complaint.

If you want to schedule clients, take credit card payments, automatically sync your calendar, and have client reminders, Acuity Scheduling is really amazing. Check it out for yourself!

PS - Let me know what you think. What’s your favorite feature or wish? Drop me a line and let me know.